Chimeric Infatuation
by Iliana Callia
Summary: Temptation is a devious, deceitful, dangerous entity, striking when its prey is most vulnerable. Narcissa wants to escape. James is an opportunity. When love blossoms between them, Snape devises a plot to use their desires for his own gain. JP/NM,SS/LP
1. Chapter 1

**Chimeric Infatuation**

Pairings_:_ [_In order of Emphasis_], James/Narcissa, Severus/Lily, James/Lily, Lucius/Narcissa, only the first pairing will be placed in the spotlight. The other three are really more fillers than anything else. But not useless fillers, mind you.

Rating_:_ _T_ for language and adult themes. May change. Lemons, if any, will _not_ be explicit but if you are easily offended, then please keep away. I am just saying that this is not a smutty story, I actually do believe that James and Narcissa can be in a relationship where much more than lemony goodness is involved.

Disclaimer_:_ The Harry Potter series, that wonderful work of genius, does not belong to me.

**Author's Note**: The first few chapters will be dedicated to keeping you up to date on the now and how and why of the characters of the story. I would appreciate you disregarding much of what was written about this generation on the original series, because I am only including some select events into this story and have twisted them as I need. I hope you have the patience to bear with me.

Thank you very much for considering reading my story. I sincerely hope I don't disappoint.

Enjoy!

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**Chapter One**

_The First of September_

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The station was as packed as ever as muggles and wizards alike pushed and shoved to get to their platforms on time. There were mothers shouting for their children to behave, friends calling to each other from two platforms away, little boys running around as if they were on acres of open space. The noise and waves of people moving was almost unbearable. It was like this every year.

"James!"

A black-haired boy, leaning inconspicuously against his trolley, turned around to see two of his friends running towards him. Or, at least, they were trying their best to run. It was not an easy feat to accomplish while pushing a heavy trolley through a thick crowd.

James waved towards them casually, before leaning harder onto his trolley, pushing it right through brick and mortar to a hidden platform. He moved aside hurriedly, knowing his friends would soon follow. During the brief moment in which he waited, his eyes swept quickly over his surroundings. To his great disappointment, his gaze seemed to have been inexplicably drawn towards the location of the person he least wanted to see.

He frowned at the sight of that pale, gaunt face, hidden partially behind curtains of greasy black hair that stuck to his cheeks. And his frustration mounted when he caught sight of who that disgusting nerd was with. How someone so revolting could be best friends with the most beautiful girl in the Gryffindor House was beyond his understanding.

A hand clapped his shoulder and he turned his attention from Severus Snape to Sirius and Remus, who had just caught up with him.

"Snape…with Lily. Again," Sirius noted. He did not need to look in order to confirm the reason for the scowl on James' face. With a slow shake of his head, he added, "Come on, how could they help themselves, seeing as how they live in the same town…?"

That was not a comfort to James.

"Exactly the point. She should be sick of that greasy geek by now," James retorted, but he grabbed his things and headed off to load them onto the train.

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"See you around, Lily," Severus said in a soft, sad tone of voice. He had seen James step onto the platform and glower at him. What Lily could see in James and his rambunctious, childish gang, Severus could not comprehend.

Summers were the greatest time of his life, when he and Lily would return to their hometown and they could act on their friendship without the judgmental and disapproving looks of their schoolmates. The Evans family, with the exception of Lily's elder sister Petunia, had always welcomed Severus into their home. Mr. and Mrs. Evans, always interested in wizardry and the magical life their daughter was leading, were very glad that Lily had a wizard friend who lived close by.

And now that summer had come to a close, Severus was thrust painfully back to reality, back to a school where Slytherins did not mingle with Gryffindors and where Purebloods were not to be associated in any way with a Mudblood.

"Come on, Sev," Lily said eagerly, giggling as she did so. "Let's see if we can save goodbyes for just a little bit later..." She, too, was well aware of the prejudices in the Hogwarts student social order.

Severus took hold of the trolley they shared and walked to the train. His Horned Owl, Baron, clicked its beak irritably in its cage and flexed its wings as its cage rattled with the movement.

"He creeps me out," Lily said, shuddering as Baron gazed at her.

"Owls are naturally creepy," Severus said, matter-of-factly, provoking a laugh from Lily.

After their belongings were loaded onto the train, they stood around to chat. And after a couple of minutes talking about the summer they were leaving behind and the school year coming ahead, they boarded and paused for a brief moment.

"So… See you around, Lily," Severus said, in the exact same way as he did a few minutes earlier.

"See you around, Sev," she answered, giving him a quick hug, and a warm, friendly smile. Her bright disposition and optimistic outlook on things did not help him at all as he watched her walk away.

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As James boarded the train and sought out an empty compartment with his friends, he ran into yet another person he felt a great aversion to; Narcissa Black. And that dislike of his was quite a shock to many. It was not easy to dislike her because, for one, she was enchantingly gorgeous. Her cream skin was glowing, soft and smooth, and her hair cascaded down to her shoulders like waves of liquid sunlight. Her full lips seemed as soft as pink rose blossoms. Her eyes, framed by thick, long lashes, were always alight with life.

And as if that was not enough, she was unbelievably wealthy, belonging to a well-known pureblood family. She was intelligent, a talented Chaser, and the only Slytherin with a rather decent personality. Narcissa was as close to perfection as any mortal could achieve, and she wore it with grace.

"James, Remus," she greeted politely, with a kind nod.

"Narcissa," the two answered in unison.

"Cissa!" Sirius greeted with enthusiasm. "How have you been…?"

She replied with the warmest of smiles as she embraced her cousin. "How I have missed you, Sirius," she said with a tone of regret. Though they were cousins, they were unable to see each other over the summer. Narcissa had been preoccupied, and Sirius was not on the best of terms with his parents, therefore not on the best of terms with the rest of the extended family either.

"How is Regulus…?" she queried, her voice softening and her smile weakening. The subject of their younger cousin was not a joyous one. Narcissa was well aware of how Sirius felt about Regulus.

Sirius shrugged, which was the most truthful reply he could give, and looked over his cousin. "Your hair has grown longer. It suits you."

"Hey," James interrupted. "If you're going to be at this for a while, Remus and I will go ahead, Sirius. Catch up?"

"No, I'll go with you," he said with a grin, knowing James' dislike of his cousin, and turned back to Narcissa. "I'll talk to you when we get to school, okay?"

She nodded and they hurried off. The train would be leaving soon, they could hear people scurrying outside and scrambling to get onto the train. Narcissa, too, walked away to find her friends. As they parted, James could not help but glance back, as the golden-haired vixen stalked off. A lump formed in his throat, and it remained lodged there throughout the journey…


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note**: Thank you very much, Readers, and cheers for my First Reviewer! Here's Chapter Two. Not much, _yet_, but have fun!

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**Chapter Two**

_Glances_

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Hogwarts, timeless as it always was, did not change in the slightest over the summer. It was a welcoming sanctuary to many of the students, Sirius Black included. He was quite certain that the previous summer would be the last that he would be able to even set a single foot into Grimmauld Place. His parents had been outraged at his choice of friends and allegiance and had explicitly informed him that he was no longer a member of the Black family. Sirius knew that he would not be returning home. And he truthfully did not want to. Those thoughts were soon brushed aside, however.

The Great Hall was abuzz as the first day of classes just ended. Tired, frustrated students took their seats at their respective tables, grumbling about one class or another. Those who had just come from Care of Magical Creatures were poking at blisters on their arms; the result of a disastrous surprise from their Professor. And the unlucky third-years from Potions were treating a few minor burns they had gotten when one of the cauldrons exploded.

Yet some were grinning from ear to ear, as they gathered among their friends and recounted happier events. Among these were James, Remus, and Peter, laughing loudly with Sirius. Unbeknownst to them, Sirius was not entirely absorbed in their conversation. He was looking across the room to the Slytherin table where his cousin sat. Summer had devastated her emotionally, and even though no one else could tell, he could. And when he had received a letter from her informing him of the news, he, too, was devastated.

"Sirius, are you still listening?" James had slapped the back of Sirius' head. "What are you looking at anyway…?"

"Huh…? Yeah, yeah," Sirius answered absentmindedly, but James had already traced his line of vision down to the Slytherins.

Narcissa was sitting at the table, but was not touching her food. She was looking down at her lap. Her brow was slightly creased and there was a hint of a frown tugging at the corner of her lips. And then she looked up, as if sensing someone watching her, and her cool, blue eyes met with James' fiery brown ones. She blinked, and the worry that she had been feeling faded into a curious confusion when she saw who was staring at her.

James looked away, a lump forming in his throat. Desperate to remove the image of Narcissa from his mind, as though it were a flesh-eating virus, he questioned Sirius, in the most indifferent manner he could muster, "What's bothering her?"

Sirius frowned and said, "Hmm. I don't know if she'd want me to talk about it."

"What, what are you talking about?" Remus asked, trying to guess what Sirius had been staring at. Peter, too, looked around interestedly.

"Is that Narcissa Black? Looking at us…?" Peter queried.

James brushed the question off. "Let's talk about something else." He didn't say that he was anxious for a change of subject because of his own personal reasons. Reasons that were a secret he had never shared with them and he was never going to be ready to. Not ever. And he didn't dare turn towards the Slytherin table to check whether Narcissa really was still staring at them or not.

"Like what…?" Sirius asked. He, too, wanted a change of subject. Narcissa had trusted him with her personal secrets, and knowing that he usually caved in when James pestered him, he did not want to risk spilling it out.

"Like…Lily," James said with a grin. Another girl would be the perfect topic to drive Narcissa away from his thoughts. "I was thinking of stepping it up this year."

"Finally," Remus and Sirius said together, copying the grin on James' face.

"I was beginning to think you were never going to make a move on her!" Sirius exclaimed.

James crossed his arms over his chest. "We can't let an angel like that end up with some slimy nerd, like Snape, right?"

Sniggers answered his rhetorical question.

Sirius smirked. "So, what's the plan?"

James looked up at the Great Hall's enchanted ceiling. The skies overhead were darkening, grayish clouds spreading steadily. What was he going to do? He and Lily were friends, but not as close as he would have liked. He searched for her at the table and found her on the opposite side, quite a few seats to the left. He watched as she twirled a lock of her hair around her fingers; a habit of hers whenever she was deep in thought. He wondered what was on her mind.

"James?" Sirius voice broke his reverie.

"I'll figure something out," he said.

At the Slytherin table, Narcissa had resumed looking at her lap, on which rested her hands holding a small piece of paper. It was crumpled, torn around the edges, but still clean and white. It was a letter that had arrived this morning, from Lucius Malfoy. She had crumpled it repeatedly throughout the day. She read it only once and quite hurriedly. She determined that its contents said nothing more than pretentious pleasantries and that the owl that had delivered it was a gift for her. He said that he wished for her to communicate with him more often and was upset at the knowledge that she did not have her own owl.

The owl that bore the letter was a Boreal Owl. And if it had not been beautiful, Narcissa would have been appalled at the thought that he wanted her to send him letters. In fact, she loved the owl from the moment it landed in front of her. Its feathers, soft to the touch, were chocolate brown dotted with white spots. It had an intelligent, knowing face, splashed with color through its bright, yellow eyes. She sent a reply, telling him that she had named the owl Fawn and that she appreciated his kindness and generosity.

But that was as far as she had been able to write. What was there to say, after all..? Whether he knew of her feelings or not, there would be no difference as to how he treated her. He was a powerful, independent man, and Narcissa knew that the only reason he wanted to hear from her was to keep track of her while she was at Hogwarts. For all she knew, he could have asked someone else to keep an eye on her as well...

As students began to leave the Hall, Narcissa looked up to watch James leave with his friends. There was something very strange about the way he looked at her. She would mention it to Sirius some time…


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note**: Thank you for reading! This Chapter's a little peek into what's going on between Lily and Severus. As always, read, review, and enjoy!

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**Chapter Three**

_Conflicts_

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_Lily, library later…? – Sev_

The one-liner note, scrawled hastily on a piece of parchment, was inserted in her Potions book.

She looked over her shoulder to where Severus was tossing ingredients into his cauldron. He had raised his eyebrows questioningly, a slight smirk on his lips, and she replied with a smile. It had been a week since the term began and they had had little time to talk. She missed him already.

"You're still friends with him…?"

Her best friend, Harriet, was comparing their potions. It was her weakest subject, and she would probably fail if Lily was not kind enough to constantly look over what she was doing. "Snape is bad news, Lily. He isn't one of us. The other day, he had a row with Bailey."

Bailey Baldwin was a Ravenclaw student. He was a handsome lad, pureblood, and the seeker for the Ravenclaw Quidditch team. He was good friends with Lily, and she often said that if he was more of a risk taker than a logician, he would have been in Gryffindor. He had a crush on Lily when they were in their third year at Hogwarts. And during the first quarter of last year, he and Lily tried dating but realized that they were better off just friends. Lily wondered if that brief relationship had anything to do with the argument between Severus and Bailey.

"I didn't know that," Lily said, her brow creasing.

"Well, at least it didn't get to them drawing their wands out." Harriet said. Lily nodded. She knew that Bailey was not the type to get into fights.

Harriet continued, in her gossip-hungry tone of voice. "The story didn't get to me until this morning, really, when I overheard some girls at the Ravenclaw table talking about it. I missed out on how it started, but I think I got the gist of it. Snape started bashing Bailey's mother. She remarried last year, to a muggle, and had a baby girl this summer. Then Snape went on and on about how Bailey's little Mudblood sister was going to be a Squib."

Lily noted how appalled Harriet was, and her own frown deepened.

"Snape is just lucky that Bailey doesn't have a single bad bone in his body, or the results would have been disastrous. If it had turned for the worse, I bet the story would've spread like wildfire," Harriet finished saying, just as their Professor started walking around to check their concoctions.

"See you later, Lily," Harriet said with a wave. She was smiling sincerely in spite of her disapproval of Lily's friendship with Severus Snape. "Try not to do anything you're going to regret, okay…? Remember; he's nothing but bad news."

Lily laughed a little, slightly uneasy, and waved back. Harriet's story was still on her mind as she walked down the halls to the library. She always looked at Severus like a shy little boy who needed caring and protection. And that was how he was, several years ago. His first year at Hogwarts was not as they had expected it to be. Severus may have gotten into the House of his choice but he was still an outcast, disliked at first sight and hated second.

Before that, when they were still in their quaint little hometown, Severus had been more self-assured. He was the one who knew everything, and he had been the one Lily ran to. Then it was as though they traded roles. As the years passed and progressed, Lily watched as her best friend was constantly teased. She often stood up for him, despite the feud between his House and hers or, rather, his House and the other three Houses.

At first, Lily never doubted that it had been the right thing to do. Severus, after all, had always been kind to her. He accepted and praised her magic even when her own sister objected to it. He had told her all about Hogwarts and they had spent hours just talking about the magical world and all the wonders that would be available to them once they came of age. But every year, it seemed to her that Severus was changing. The fight he had with Bailey was not the first.

Without even realizing it, she had reached the library. Breathing deeply, she entered and headed to where she knew Severus would be; near the Restricted Section.

Severus was not much of a bookworm. But he liked the library. It was quiet, secluded, and the brawny bullies that often picked on him did not frequent it. Studious students were not often tormentors and he was safe from them. They could do no more than stare at him with antipathy in their expressions. And the Restricted Section was perfect. No one hung around there, worried that the librarian might catch them and assume they were up to no good.

He smiled as Lily approached, but it quickly faded when he saw the uneasiness on her face. "What's the matter, Lily…?" he asked.

"Severus, I'll get straight to the point, okay…?" she said. "I heard you had a fight with Bailey…" She pressed her lips tightly together and Severus frowned.

"Are you taking his side?" he asked, unable to keep the frustration from staining his voice.

"No," Lily replied. "I am not taking sides. I want you to tell me what happened."

He relaxed. Lily never was one of those girls who listened to rumors. "Look… His friends were… They said things… And he just happened to be there. It just happened that it was the only way I could fight back." Lily's uneasiness did not abate. "Lily, I'm sorry. It was wrong, I was wrong. But…"

She stopped him, and smiled slightly. "I missed you. How about we forget this…?" Right after she finished speaking, her mind reeled. She was overlooking his faults, like she always did. She didn't have to. Maybe she shouldn't. Why did she?

He, too, smiled. She was an angel. He loved her. How he wished he could tell her he loved her. They sat down on the floor and leaned on the wall, and then they picked up right where they left off a week ago.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note**: Thank you for being here, readers! Enjoy Chapter Four! Read and Review and Please and Thank You Very Much. Have fun!

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**Chapter Four**

_Walks and Talks_

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_"Sirius, wait!"

Narcissa nearly missed her cousin as the staircase suddenly decided to switch landings. Fortunately, she managed to catch her footing just as the steps broke off. Muttering curses, convinced that those animated staircases were conspiring against her, she grabbed hold on Sirius outstretched arm to steady herself.

"Are you alright?" he asked, holding back a fit of laughter. It was, after all, a funny sight to see a girl like Narcissa practically flying over several steps at once in order to reach him.

"Yes, I'm fine," she replied, looking at him. "Thank you." She remembered how odd it used to be to look him straight in the eye. They had inherited their eyes from their fathers, and were exactly the same shade of deep ocean blue that darkened and lightened depending on their mood. And seeing her own eyes on Sirius always felt as though she was staring into a reflection of herself.

Sirius chuckled and then embraced her. "I have missed you, Cissa." She was his favorite cousin. It would suffice to say that he adored her and doted on her. It was like having a darling little sister, even though their age gap was only a year. And, fairly enough, Sirius was the older brother that Narcissa wished she could have had. Narcissa never could look up to her elder sisters, Bellatrix especially.

"And I you, Sirius," she answered with a kiss on his cheek. "You never replied to the letters I sent you over the summer…"

"I had no idea what to say," he said, scratching the back of his head. He had been guilty about not writing to her. He knew she was looking for comfort, that she needed someone who would listen and take her side and tell her everything was going to be alright.

They started walking along the corridors.

"Can I ask you something?" she said softly.

Sirius braced himself, but the question was not what he expected…

"Does James ever talk about me…?"

"What…?" Sirius asked incredulously, laughing. He had been caught off guard. "That was definitely not what I expected you to ask. Do you like him now…?"

The blush on her face came and went before she could reply. "No. But… I would be shocked if you have failed to notice this, because you cannot be so dense. There is something strange about the way he looks at me…"

Sirius could not deny that. He noticed it as well. The moment that James catches sight of Narcissa, he would clam up, as if he had developed a nervous tic triggered by her presence. He always wondered whether to voice out his curiosity but thought better of it.

"Honestly speaking, he never talks about you. Not in an unusual way, at least. He likes Lily, you know that," said Sirius, smirking. Just as James could pry every secret out of him without even trying, the same went for Narcissa. But he realized that she was an excellent confidante, and after a while he spoke with her as freely as he would if she had been himself, even with matters involving James and his other friends.

"I see," was her quiet reply. Still, it was unsettling, and she did not know why. James was just a boy, an irascible and irrational boy. To be so bothered by him in this way was simply ridiculous. Back when she was eleven, in her first year, she had thought he was quite a charming lad. But as the crush was fleeting, she later attributed this to the idea that perhaps she had been attracted to him only for his closeness with her cousin. After all, Sirius was quite in awe of James and praised him often.

"Narcissa," Sirius began, "about your recent engagement…"

She bit her lower lip as Sirius went on.

"You did not have to say yes. Do you honestly believe he loves you?"

She sighed. 'No. But I believe I can learn to love him. Lucius is a powerful man, and it is an honor and great privilege to be his fiancé."

"You stole those words from Cygnus." Sirius never could call Narcissa's father Uncle.

Narcissa laughed lightly. "Yes, I did."

As they rounded a corner, they heard a familiar voice coming from the adjacent hallway. Narcissa almost stopped at realizing it was James. He was talking to a girl from Gryffindor – she could tell by the red and gold insignia on her robes – but she did not know who it was. She was familiar, though, perhaps one of Lily's friends.

"Hey, James!" Sirius greeted, at seeing his best friend. Narcissa marveled at how he kept his face straight, despite the curious matter they had just discussed about him. Then again, she had little reason to be surprised. Being calm and composed, and having an unshakable poker face, ran in their family.

James turned in their direction. Narcissa could not be certain if she imagined it or not, but James looked as if he stopped halfway through forming a smile and then decided to keep a blank expression. She was certain, however, that this had much to do with her being with Sirius.

"Hi, Sirius," the girl greeted them shyly. Narcissa noted her face was slightly flushed, that she had a small smile and that her gaze was directed downward. She smiled; this girl liked Sirius. That was alright, though. She was fairly lovely.

"Hello, Harriet. Where's Lily…?"

So her name was Harriet. Narcissa remembered now. She was Lily's best friend, Sirius had mentioned her in passing and Narcissa recognized her from their group when they were at the Great Hall. But as she was not interested in Lily, it did not occur to her to be acquainted with Lily's friends.

"She's in the library. She's been there for a while, I was thinking of running over there to get her. Want to come…?"

Narcissa suppressed a titter. Sirius had reached up to scratch the back of his head. Narcissa, sensing a refusal coming on, tapped his arm lightly and smiled. Sirius looked at her and it was as if an unspoken message passed between them. Not only was it a great time for Sirius to pay attention to a girl attracted to him, it would give Narcissa a moment alone with James. Thankfully, her cousin could read her well enough to understand.

"Sure, Harriet, come on."

The joy Harriet felt showed in her demeanor.

"Later, James," Sirius said with a grin.

"Good luck," James mouthed, as Sirius walked off. And with that done, he turned on his heels and was just about to hop off when Narcissa's voice resounded in his head.

"Wait. James. I need to talk to you…"


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note**: Once again, thank you! The plot finally starts to pick up in this Chapter. If you're wondering why things are going a bit slow, it can probably be linked to the word count I've set for my Chapters (1000-1500) which makes a comfortable write for me and hopefully a comfortable read for you. Besides, there will be parts that are set to fast-forward. So to make up for it, I take my time in scenes where I can afford to do so.

Anyway, enough of that. Read and Review, and have lots of fun!

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**Chapter Five**

_Last Minute Decisions_

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_"What's on your mind?" he tried to sound as casual as he could, but he could feel the lump starting to form and rise in his throat. _'Keep it together, man,'_ he thought to himself.

"You. You are on my mind," she said.

"Me…?"

"Yes, I have been thinking about you often."

It was starting to sound like one of those sappy muggle romance movies. It was the scene where her eyes would dramatically brim with tears as she poured out her heart and soul. She would tell him he had always been in her mind and heart and she could not escape him, that she needed him. She would wrap her arms around him and… God, what was he thinking…?

The expression on her face, however, was very different from what a romantic mood calls for. In fact, it was though they were talking about something as casual as the weather.

James raised his eyebrows. "Why?"

She kept her hands behind her back and rocked on her heels for a while. "Well," she started, lightly biting her lower lip. James felt a smile forcing its way onto his face. She was so adorable.

"You see," said, looking downwards shyly. If he could read her mind, he would see a rush of images of himself; images from the time when she had liked him. And even now, she could not deny that some of the sparks were still there. "I noticed, lately, you have been acting strangely around me. Why is that…? Is there something wrong with me…?"

She looked up at him, innocently, insecurely, as if she were preparing herself for a harsh admonition. Her eyes were exactly like his best friend's yet different somehow. Sirius had a powerful gleam in his. Hers held a peaceful shimmer, more yielding, more docile, more…captivating.

He swallowed hard. She stirred feelings within him that he desperately wanted to subdue but it was impossible. And it was unknown to him that similar feelings were overpowering her as well. The lump fought against him, choking him almost, as a bead of sweat trickled down his temple. It was cold.

"No. Narcissa, anyone would be hard pressed to find someone even half as perfect as you are," he answered, surprised at what he had just said. But there was no taking it back. He grinned sheepishly. "How could anything be wrong with you?"

She stared at him, the ice within her eyes battling the fire he emitted, determining the truth. "There is more," she said simply. "But you do not want to tell me."

_'This girl is in the wrong House,' _he thought, but aloud he said, "Where did you learn to read minds?"

A moment of relief came over him when she laughed. "I don't read minds. To put it simply, it's just that I can tell…" she murmured. She reached up to fix his glasses, which had been sliding down the bridge of his nose. "Relax. This isn't a criminal investigation."

"Perhaps, but a single word from you can incriminate me, and will probably be enough to send me to Azkaban for life," he smirked.

"Does that mean you are never going to tell me?"

"No. I mean… Well. Do you want to know the truth? It's going to sound shallow."

"Would I ask if I didn't want to know…?"

He could not help but smile at her. "Walk with me."

She latched her arm onto his and they headed along the corridors until they reached an empty classroom. He led her inside, and Narcissa hopped onto one of the desks. James watched her, thinking about how beautiful she was, about how every silly movement seemed graceful when it came to her. He swallowed hard again, futilely.

"Tell me," she said, getting straight to the point as soon as she was seated comfortably.

James didn't wait for a pause. "My parents wanted you for me."

Narcissa blinked quickly twice and then said, "I see."

Now it was James turn to blink quickly. "That doesn't bother you…?"

"Did you, or do you, want me for you…?"

The question created a series of tumultuous fluctuations in his mind.

_Of course he wants her. Who in his right mind would not want Narcissa Black? But he wants Lily, too. And since Bailey is out of the picture, he now had a chance with Lily. His parents would want whatever would make him happy. But is Lily really the only one who could grant him happiness? Couldn't Narcissa make him happy, too?_

He reached for her tentatively, and brushed a curly lock of flaxenhair behind her ear. He could not resist it. "I think I do want you."

"You think you do…?" she asked, blinking ever so slowly. "Why did your parents want me for you?"

James sighed and stuffed his hands into his pockets. "You know what's going on, don't you? Things are changing, Narcissa, changing for the worst. And my mother's a bit of a worrywart." He scratched the back of his head, just like Sirius would do. "She thinks it helps to be Pureblood. She thinks being associated with the Blacks, a renowned Pureblood family, would help us through these changing times. And then a couple of years back, she met you."

It was two years ago. Sirius, who was visiting James, decided to bring Narcissa along. She was only thirteen, but she had looked and acted mature for her age. She charmed her way into the heart of James' parents, without meaning to. It was as if she could say and do no wrong. And they loved her even more because she was a cousin of their son's best friend, a boy they treated as their own. It was after she had left that they suggested she might be the perfect girl for their son.

James, at first, thought it was absurd. Why Narcissa, when there was Lily…? But when term began that year, he noticed things about Narcissa that he never bothered about before. Everyday seemed to add to her already dazzling beauty. And despite her being in Slytherin, she had a heart as gentle as a timid young unicorn. And when Lily began dating Bailey, James involuntarily turned his focus on Narcissa. It was then that his apprehension at her presence began, and continued even after the episode between Lily and Bailey ended. And, apparently, she was aware of it.

He saw that she was biting her lip once more. "I had no idea what to do. And you just had to make everything more complicated. Beautiful Narcissa Black… How could anyone expect me to resist…? I never told Remus and Peter, or even Sirius…"

His words were lost to her as her heartbeat quickened and drowned them out. She was engaged to Lucius Malfoy. Was she willing to risk losing that for a chance with James Potter? This could be an opportunity at a love that was of her choice, not something she would need to wait for, to coax to begin. She liked James, there was no denying it. And here he was, debating whether he liked her, too.

"James," she said, silencing him. "Do you want me, or not...?"

He frowned, indecisive. She hopped off the table and walked slowly towards him. Her hands were behind her back again. She took a deep breath and licked her lips. Glancing up at him, their eyes were once again directed at one another. And each could read what the other honestly and selfishly wanted.

It was like a muggle romance movie again. He took her hand in his, she took a step closer. They leaned forward and their lips met in a tender, unquestionably loving kiss. The lump in his throat disappeared. Her heart relaxed with relief. This was not how they thought their conversation would go. And yet there it was…their answer, the magic.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note**: Thank you, as always. Here's Chapter Six. Have fun!

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**Chapter Six**

_Kisses and its Aftermath_

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_"Cheer up, Harriet. You know Sirius was never interested in girls."

It was a fruitless attempt at coaxing a smile onto her friend's face. Lily had run into Sirius and Harriet just as she was leaving the library. And it was just in time, too. She had no idea what could have happened and what she would have done if her friends had seen that she and Severus... She roughly pushed the thought out of her mind and returned her attention to Harriet. Her poor best friend had been making advances on Sirius for the longest time but the boy simply would not budge. In fact, the moment that they saw Lily, Sirius had hastily excused himself and headed to the Great Hall for supper.

"He's such an insensitive prick!" Harriet practically yelled.

Lily laughed. "He is not. He just really isn't into girls."

Harriet frowned in contempt. "We'll see about that."

"You aren't planning to hex him are you?"

"No. But that's good, too."

They laughed.

"So… How are you and James?" Harriet asked with a wide grin on her face. It was almost as if she was just asking about the latest piece of gossip rather than inquiring on her best friend.

Lily rolled her eyes and sighed. "There is no 'Me and James,' Harriet. I thought there was something, but I'm starting to feel like I guessed wrong."

"You should've stuck with Bailey," replied Harriet, matter-of-factly. "He hasn't done so much as look at a girl after the two of you fell apart."

It provoked another laugh from Lily. "You say that as if he and I were going out for years."

"Well, for a guy like him, that was probably a few years. He's head-over-heels crazy for you, Lily," Harriet answered. "You should listen to me for once and try going out with him again."

_'He isn't the only one head-over-heels over me,'_ Lily thought. _'There is Severus.'_ And again, her thoughts turned around, back to when they were in the library. But just as she had done a while ago, she let it slip right out of her mind.

"Think about it, Lily!" Harriet was insisting now. "You and Bailey are so perfect for each other!"

As they were about to enter the Great Hall, their paths crossed with Narcissa's. A friendly smile lit up her face as she greeted the two Gryffindors before heading to the Slytherin table. Her friends were waiting for her. Lily never guessed that only a few moments before, she had been kissing James.

Sirius saw his cousin walk towards the other Slytherins and studied her carefully. But her disposition fed him no information, not even a hint, of what had transpired between her and James. She was as calm and composed as ever. She merely smiled when she caught his gaze and he could do nothing but smile back. There would be time to ask her later. And even if there weren't, there would definitely be time to interrogate James. The thought pleased him when he saw his best friend approach moments later.

"Hey, James, what took you so long?" Sirius greeted with an implicating grin, as he made room on the bench for James.

"Wouldn't you know?" James answered, taking his seat between Remus and Sirius. His lips were pressed in a smile and his movements had a sort of spryness to them. The cheerfulness in his expression was a telltale sign to Sirius, who knew him best. Remus and Peter noticed, but did not comment. James, unable to help himself, stole a quick look at the Slytherin table. Narcissa was seated with her back towards them, but he spotted her immediately. Who could mistake that exquisite blonde for anyone else? The flicker in his brown eyes was unmistakable.

Watching James from the corner of his eyes as they ate, Sirius thought it best to question him in the privacy of the Gryffindor dormitory. He saw Lily looking at them discreetly with Harriet whispering things to her. He was a hundred percent certain that Lily now knew that Narcissa and James had been alone together. If there was anyone who knew James as well as Sirius did, it would be her. And just as Sirius knew James acted strangely around Narcissa, Lily was sure to have noted that as well. His sudden change of behavior was as clear as a glittering billboard that something was definitely up.

In the comfort and silence of their room, James told Sirius everything. And he fell backwards on his bed with his arms outstretched, uttering a sigh of pure contentment. He gingerly pressed his fingers against his lips, remembering the feel of Narcissa's on his, those soft, delicious lips that tasted of strawberries.

Sirius watched with slight disbelief. After hearing James' talks about Lily and dreams about Lily for so long, he found this unexpected occurrence quite difficult to absorb. And the knowledge that his cousin was already engaged to be married caused a stitch to poke at his side.

"I never thought this was going to happen, Padfoot," James said, beaming as though he had just won the lottery. "Does it bother you, though? I know she's like a little sister to you…"

Sirius punched him lightly in the chest, but with just enough force to drive a bit of his breath out of him. "If it was any other guy, I'd hex his guys out."

They laughed and Sirius, although elated that James was overjoyed, was worrying about Lucius Malfoy. He was a powerful man, just as Narcissa said. What would happen when Lucius found out that Narcissa was giving up a marriage and life with him for James Potter? And then there was Lily. James and Lily had always had hidden, mutual feelings for each other. Why now did James decide to throw his chances with her for Narcissa?

"There was a catch, though," James said, sitting up. Sirius silenced his thoughts and urged James to go on. "She said that we needed to keep this a secret."

"Did she say why?" Sirius asked. Apparently, Narcissa was still sane enough to keep in mind that there were factors stabbing swords against the idea of a relationship between her and James.

"No," James replied. "She told me to trust her and wait."

Sirius felt a jolt of apprehension. "Do you trust her?"

"Strangely enough," James said, lying back down, "I do. Wholeheartedly."

Later, when James was asleep, Sirius sat in bed, still wide awake. What did Narcissa stand to gain from a relationship with James? There was simply no motive. He loved his cousin dearly, but if she hurt James, he would retaliate against her as he would to James if he hurt Narcissa. His head pounded. Narcissa had never done anything immoral, despite the cruelty of her lineage.

Just as he was lying down, knowing he seriously needed sleep, a tap on the window broke the silence.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note**: Thanks! Sorry that this chapter is a little late... Classes have resumed, to my utter dismay. Enjoy!

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**Chapter Seven**

_Watching the Bystanders_

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_

He recognized the owl that had appeared just outside the window. It was Fawn. He smirked now, thinking about how coincidental it was that she chose that name for her owl. It had a letter clamped in its beak, rather than tied to its leg. The envelope was clean, and sealed. It was just like Narcissa to send nothing less than a letter written and enclosed in an orderly fashion.

He opened the window as quietly as he could and allowed the owl to flutter into the room. It landed noiselessly on his bed, dropping the letter carefully in front of it. After checking to make sure that none of the others had woken up – especially not James - Sirius held the window open, expecting the owl to fly back out. But it did not. Apparently, Fawn was to wait for a reply.

Sirius closed the window and sat back on his bed. The owl watched him intently, its yellow eyes staring at him much like a cat's would. He opened the envelope and drew out the letter.

_My dearest cousin, still awake, I hope._

_I will not bother with the details of my chat with James earlier this evening because I don't see the need to. I am sure he has informed you just as well as – if not better than – I would have. Reserve your judgment, Sirius, because I can not only explain, but make you understand._

_I have always liked James. You laughed at me when I first told you years ago, do you remember? And you have told me countless times that he has always liked Lily. And just today you implied that it was unlikely for him to harbor feelings for me. It was as if you were warning me, with subtle hints and implications, that James was already marked out for someone else. I cannot tell if these warnings have been intentional or not, but I have been listening and I have suppressed my feelings._

_Today, James expressed that he does want me, and the rush that came over me is inexplicable. It was as if he had spoken the only words that could make me realize that I cannot deny this feeling. Why not, I told myself, when this is the first opportunity at love that is ever presented to me. Yes, I chose to accept Lucius' proposal. But there is no love there, Sirius, not on his part nor on mine. He chose me for my bloodline, for our family. I agreed for his power and wealth. Superficial, isn't it?_

_I will tell James the truth._

_But until I muster the strength to do so, you must promise to hold my secret a little while longer. May I have your word on this…?_

How could Sirius say no…?

He adored her and loved her and if he could have snatched her from the shallow, insincere social class that they were both born in, he would have. But escape had never been on her mind. She was attached to her family. This relationship with James is the first serious infraction she has ever done. And even then, he could tell by her letter that she was not going to let this ruin anything.

He rummaged around his things, careful not to make too much noise, for a piece of parchment, ink, and his quill. Once equipped, he wrote.

_Of course…but I hope to Hell that you know what you are doing._

_Pleasant dreams, Narcissa._

He signed it with love and rolled it up. Upon opening the window, Fawn snatched the parchment from his fingers as she took flight. Sirius watched the owl fly away and felt a yawn coming on. He really should be sleeping.

October was strangely colder than it usually was and even without a breeze, it was like the air itself was as cold as ice. Black school robes were overshadowed by bonnets, scarves, and gloves in the colors of the four Houses. They were like a burst of spring flowers against the gray skies, gray landscape, and even grayer stone walls of Hogwarts Castle.

It was a Saturday, October 31st, and everyone was out on the grounds despite the cold weather. Several were busy horsing around. A few were seated under the scattered trees, reading a book or chatting with friends. And even fewer were in the Quidditch Field.

The Gryffindor team was rigorously training for their upcoming match against Slytherin, and a small number of students were sitting at the stands, watching. Among the number were Lily and Harriet, joined by Bailey. Close by sat Severus Snape, poring over a book. Further on was Sirius with Narcissa, watching the Gryffindor team intently.

Lily had agreed to come because Harriet had wanted to. Of course, her friend was not interested in watching the practice at all. She only came to steal glances at Sirius. And then they had run into Bailey, who asked to join them. Lily had wanted to say no, knowing that James might misinterpret seeing her with him, but she caught sight of Severus watching her. After weighing out which would displease James more, she decided to choose being with Bailey. That would most likely prevent Severus going with her, which would have done worse than mere displeasure. Besides, what had happened in the library was still on her mind and she was still a little distressed by it.

As she sat there by the Quidditch Field, she found another reason to be distressed. James, forever the show-off, was pulling off stunts on his broom. He did flips and spins and dives, all the wile grinning like an egghead. He stood up and balanced him on the broomstick, flying it like a surfboard on water, and then whooped and cheered. It was an unsightly display, considering that James was the Captain, and the whole team was shouting at him to cut it out.

Lily wondered who he was showing off for. He had never done that during practice before, when there were no spectators. And as if in answer, she saw Narcissa in the sidelines. She had to admit, that girl was unbelievably beautiful. She would have been able to pass off for a Greek Goddess. Even on this drab, dreary day, she was lovely and looking at her made Lily feel so plain. She was no longer paying attention to James, or even to Bailey and Harriet who were talking to her simultaneously about two different things. She was wondering what Narcissa and Sirius were discussing.


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note**: Thank you to my reviewers! Glad to see there are two new ones. I hope you keep reading. Thank you for all the support! Enjoy!

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**Chapter Eight**

_Raindrops and Rainbows_

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_

Severus was gripping his book tighter than he normally should be. The wrinkled pages and the nearly-torn spine showed the intensity of his rage. He had acted with undue audacity with Lily, and now she was furious with him. Or if she was not furious, she was at least thoroughly offended. And now Severus was quite certain that his friendship with Lily was not worth scarring over a second of a kiss between them.

He had acted purely on selfish impulse and, as with many moments like that, the reason for his action was a blur. He assumed that he had not been thinking, that he simply wanted to and he had done it before he could restrain himself. Lily had not refused his apology, but she has refused to see him since. For Severus, it was a punishment that seemed worse than a sentence served in Azkaban.

Looking at her now, he could tell she was deeply troubled. But her worry seemed to have sunk deeper since that day they had spent in the library. There was something more, and he wondered what it was, thinking that if he could alleviate it, her disappointment with him would lighten. All he has noticed the past weeks, however, was that Lily was devoting much of her time and attention on looking at James and, now and again, Narcissa.

He pocketed his book. A light drizzle was starting to fall. Lily and her friends had risen just as James gathered his team, probably to tell them practice has ended. Bailey called out to James that the three of them would go ahead. As Captain, he had to be the one to gather the Quidditch balls and store them. James saluted in reply and, after dismissing his team, flew off on his broom to catch the elusive snitch.

Severus turned discreetly to his other side, where Sirius and Narcissa were. Sirius was getting up, but Narcissa was not. Sirius fondly ruffled her hair, and she pushed him off lightly. When he left, she started watching James intently. Severus turned to look as well. And anyone with half a mind could see that James was looking at her, too, between frustrated glances at took him hardly a second to realize why, and he was desperate to prove his assumption. He stood up and left.

As soon as he was out of sight, Narcissa leaned over the bottom seat of the stands and James flew towards her. "I thought that git would never leave!" he exclaimed with laughter. "Come on." He offered her his hand and cocked his head to one side, wordlessly asking her to take a flight with him.

She took it without hesitation and climbed onto the broomstick just in front of him. "I know mine isn't half as good as yours," he said awkwardly, as she scrutinized his broomstick. It was not in his nature to admit any shortcoming. But all she did was turn to him and smile.

"I might have the better broomstick, but you are more brilliant on one," she said.

She clasped the smooth, polished wood and he placed his hands on top of hers. "Let me show you a few of my tricks then," he whispered.

"No, no," she said. "We need to find that snitch before it gets too dark."

"You're being boring."

"Yeah? Well, I bet I can find it before you can."

"Game on."

The drizzling grew a little stronger and the droplets of water were cold on their skin as the air rushed blew them. They stayed suspended in the air, James focused on finding the little golden ball and Narcissa preoccupied by something else. She had yet to tell James that she was engaged to Lucius. She had procrastinated too long and every passing day made telling him more difficult. When he finds out, they could no longer be together. But how could she let go, when she wanted him so badly…?

And she thought about Lily. Sirius told her that Lily had been asking about James. She had been wondering why he was always so preoccupied. And Harriet spoke to him about it as well. She said that Lily thought James had always liked her. And now it looked like James was only interested in Narcissa. Sirius himself had expressed his concern.

"Found it!" James voice rang in her ears as he turned to the left. The air whipped around them as he maneuvered cleverly to keep up with the snitch.

"I should get a prize," he said, the smugness echoing in his voice.

The snitch was directly in front of them. He gently released her hands and she stretched out to grasp it. As her fingertips closed over it, she felt almost triumphant.

"Amazing, right?" he said, sensing how she felt.

And it was. She was a Chaser for the Slytherin team, not a Seeker, and she had never held the snitch before. There was something amazing about catching that snitch, even if it wasn't during a game, even if there was no one watching and nothing at stake.

"Narcissa, look," he was pointing roughly west. The setting sun had made an appearance through a gap in the gray clouds. Its light was riddled through the droplets scattered in the sky creating a slightly hazy rainbow that formed a continuous arch.

"It's lovely," she said, almost wanting to touch it. But it was there only for a moment. It soon faded and the sky lost color once more. And when the sun returned to its hiding place behind the clouds, the rain suddenly became stronger, making the cold worse as well.

James headed downwards and landed softly on the springy grass. James grabbed the chest storing the balls and they ran towards the nearest available shade; the covered stairway heading up to the spectator's benches. Narcissa handed the snitch to James and pulled off her scarf as soon as they were out of the rain. Then she wrung as much water out of her robes as she could.

"I wish I paid attention in Charms," she mumbled. "It would be so great if we could have a flame right now. All I was ever good at is Transfiguration."

James sniggered as he closed up the chest and shook rainwater off his broom. "I was never good in Charms either. It was Lily who always got me through that class."

Narcissa bit her lip at the mention of Lily.

"Is something wrong, Narcissa…?"

She looked up at James and knew she had to let him know. She could not have him throwing away his chances with Lily for her, when it was certain their relationship could not last.

"I have been keeping something from you…" she said softly, the guilt she felt seeping into the tone of her voice. "And I hope that you will not be angry with me…"

"Alright," James said without hesitation. After all, what could her secret be…?

"I'm engaged…"

James mouth fell slightly open. "Narcissa, you're fifteen. How can you be engaged…?"

"Summer, Lucius proposed, I said yes," she said in a hurry, turning her back on James. But she could still feel his stare boring into her.


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Note**: Thank you for reading and reviewing! I'm sorry for the late update. To make it up to you, I'll be posting two consecutive chapters. Enjoy!

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**Chapter Nine**

_Wanting To Stay and Watching You Go_

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_"Bloody Hell, Narcissa, is this how you break up with your boyfriends?" he asked. Even now he was making jokes. He touched her shoulder and gently made her face him. "Now I understand why you wanted to keep this a secret. I suppose I should've known this was simply too good to be true."

She could not look up at him, but she could still see the weak, uneasy smile on his face.

"So, is this it then…?" he said. Both his hands were on her shoulders now.

"I don't want…" she murmured almost inaudibly against the loud downpour.

"What…?"

She looked up tentatively with only her eyes. "I don't want you to go but…" She looked away from him once more.

"You should have thought about that before all this," he said sternly, but not unkindly. He lifted her gaze to him. "Please look at me when I'm talking to you." It was like he was reprimanding a very small child, watching his words carefully. He brushed the wetness off her cheeks with his fingers, knowing they were tears from the warmth of them.

"You should be with Lily," she said. "I know how you feel about her. And I know how she feels about you. I cannot be true to you, James, because I am promised to someone else."

"And if you weren't…?"

She blinked. "We both know the answer to that. But I cannot go back on this promise. James, we have only been together for a month. We should stop before we fall too far…"

"A month…?!" His tone resounded pure disbelief. "Narcissa, for two years I have been struggling against a pit of quicksand. When I fight back, I get pulled deeper in. The only way I'm getting out of this is if I don't resist it. And you just said so yourself, you don't want me to go…"

She had put her hands behind her back. "What do you propose we do…?"

He leaned forward and kissed her forehead, her cheeks, and slowly found his way to her lips. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her a little closer. "I don't know," he murmured against her. "We'll find a way. There has to be a way."

"You should be with Lily," she repeated. "I don't want to have to watch you lose her, someone who will be completely yours, for a person who cannot be with you… I know you love her, and she will be able to love you wholeheartedly. So please…"

The rain stopped.

"Narcissa, stay with me," he said. "I should be angry, but I'm not. I can't explain right now what this means to me. We could come up with a compromise."

He paused.

Then sighed, "I will be with Lily." He stroked her hair lovingly, smoothing out the tangles that the rain and wind had caused. "But there is one thing you need to do for me."

"Anything."

He grinned, as if there was absolutely nothing wrong. "Stay, and let me get over this slowly."

She leaned against him. He was warm, despite being soaked through. "Thank you," she breathed. This was as much a relief to her as it was to him. She would not have to lose him, not yet, perhaps not until she herself was ready. "I love you, James…"

"And I love you, Narcissa." He kissed her again, more passionately. He knew he must cherish each kiss, and each embrace. Every second he has with her was precious; only time will tell when they will finally have to part.

Severus, who had watched Narcissa and James, walked away from the Quidditch Field as soon as they left with a pleased look on his face. This was his key to opening Lily's heart. When she finds out that James was not only in a relationship with Narcissa, but was also planning to cheat on her, she would be utterly disgusted. The Great James Potter will be no better than a heap of dragon dung.

At first, he had been concerned that they were going to see him when they were running towards his hiding place for shade. He had rushed back up the stairs but they did not go further than the bottom landing. He had leaned against the corner wall, hidden in the shadow, in order to eavesdrop on their conversation. What he heard was a delightful surprise.

He headed straight for the Great Hall for supper was just about to be served. It was Halloween, and the Hall was lavishly decorated with the colors for the occasion. Pumpkins were scattered not only across the table but were hovering overhead as well, with flickering candlelight highlighting the carved out faces. Candelabra were also placed on top of the tables, providing much of the light, creating a subtle almost eerie atmosphere. Streamers in black and orange lined the colonnades, and the ghosts added to the overall look by soaring through tables and walls as they pleased.

Severus hated it. He was not a fan of celebrations and parties. To him, they were pretentious and served little purpose more than to create a false aura of happiness. But he was too preoccupied to pay attention. He hurried to the Gryffindor table rather than to his own and sought Lily out. It was not difficult. Her fiery red hair stood out against the rest, and she often sat at the same place anyway, so he found her merely seconds after he had begun looking.

But his heart suddenly sank when he saw who she was with.

To her left was Harriet, her best friend, wolfing down as much of the sweets laid out on the table as she could. Her appetite was unbelievable for a girl. But it was the person to Lily's right that bothered Severus. Just as he could never mistake her beautiful red hair for anyone else's, he could tell with a glance that black-haired boy, guffawing in an unattractive manner, was James Potter.

He strode over anyway, though his confidence had faded. "Lily, can I talk to you, please…?" he said, upon reaching them.

"Well, well, if it isn't good ole Snivellus Snape," Sirius mumbled.

"How daft can you get…?" James said. "Your table's over there, slime ball."

Lily smacked his cheek playfully. "Stop that." She turned to Severus and asked what it was he wanted to talk about.

"I was hoping we could talk alone."

"Oh, alright," she answered, getting up off her seat. Her displeasure and hesitation was apparent on her face. Severus led her off to the side, beside one of the thick stone columns, and looked at her solemnly.

"It's about James. You shouldn't be with him," he began. Lily frowned and wanted to interrupt, but Severus stopped her. "I saw him at the Quidditch Field today, with Narcissa. I heard them talking. James is just going to cheat on you, Lily."

"Sev, I think you are going too far," Lily said. "I know James, and he would never do that. Besides, why would Narcissa go out with James?" At this, she leaned a little closer to Severus. "I'm not supposed to let this sneak out, but Sirius told Harriet that Narcissa is engaged, to Lucius Malfoy, no less. I don't think Narcissa's stupid enough to get on Malfoy's bad side."

She walked away, not waiting for a retort from Severus. It was an upsetting turn of events for him. "Please," he called out, "Lily, think about it." How was he going to convince her…?


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

_The First Game of the Season_

The stands at the Quidditch Field were filled will spectators for the first match of the year, despite the gray November skies and chilly weather. Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, the Houses not participating in the games, traded their colors temporarily for those of the teams they were supporting. It was a wave of red and gold, with insignificant spots of green and silver, overshadowing the cluster of Slytherins at one end of the stands. The Gryffindors were the favorite to win the match and it showed.

"Yeah, go, James!"

Lily stared up at Sirius when he shouted. "Sirius, how can you hold up that Slytherin banner and cheer for James at the same time?"

"Narcissa can look at me to see the colors. But with James, looking for that snitch, he won't bother," Sirius answered. Harriet joined Lily in laughter and Sirius silenced them, just as the game was about to start. The Slytherin team had flown in to join the Gryffindors at the center of the field. Sirius caught sight of Narcissa, her golden hair tied at the temples into braids then brought together in a ponytail. Her green cloak billowed around her slight frame as the wind picked up. She looked at Sirius and waved casually before circling the field with her teammates.

As she passed James, he winked at her, and she said, "I'll wager fifty galleons that I'd score a hundred and fifty points before you catch that snitch."

He smirked, accepting her challenge, as she flew to the center where one of the Gryffindor Chasers was waiting. She was the best Chaser on the opposing team, the ace up the Slytherins' silver sleeves. The Gryffindors had lost their match against the Slytherins in his third year – second year in her case – because they had underestimated her. The buzz was that Slytherin could do just as well with her as their only Chaser as they would if they had had six other players.

"Fraternizing with the enemy, Captain?"

He saw a broomstick zoomed past him and ended at a hover by his side. It was Molly, one of their Beaters. At first, it had been strange accepting a girl as a Beater, but after tryouts, it was obvious that she packed a punch more powerful than a Bludger itself.

"No," he answered. "We made a bet."

"They make her do all the work for the team, and she thinks she actually can," Molly said, and James knew she was indicating Narcissa. And it was true. The Slytherin Chasers did nothing more than to pass the Quaffle to Narcissa. And then it was all up to her to make a goal.

Molly swung the bat over her shoulder. "I'll bring their precious little Narcissa down!"

James' eyes widened with horror at hearing the determination in Molly's voice, but what could he do? He shook it off and hoped fervently that the Slytherin Beaters could keep the Bludger off of Narcissa. Molly was known to make good her threats.

The whistle sounded. The Quaffle was a blur of red in the air before it was caught by none other than Narcissa. She dived downwards, holding the Quaffle tight at her side, maneuvering cleverly past the three Gryffindor Chasers who had rushed after her. Hardly a minute into the game, Narcissa had garnered ten points for Slytherin.

James soared higher, which made a great vantage point both for finding the snitch and watching the game. He caught sight of the Slytherin Seeker scouting around as well and he knew he had to hurry. The sound of a bell announced that Narcissa had just made another goal. He marveled at her speed.

Lily watched James from the stands. Seekers were usually the most boring, inactive players during a game when the snitch had yet to be located, but Lily had no desire to watch anyone else. Because of this, she noticed earlier how Narcissa whispered something to him. Severus' words echoed in her mind. She intended to keep a close eye on the two of them. She and James had started going out since Halloween a week ago and it had made her inexplicably happy, but if she finds out he was cheating on her…

Another ten points was scored for Slytherin and the Slytherins' cheers were overwhelming.

Narcissa seemed extraordinarily spirited that day. She waited until the Quaffle was caught by Robert, the newest Gryffindor Chaser, then she raced after him. He was nervous, this being his first game, and was easy prey. She caught up to him in a heartbeat and pushed the Quaffle out of his arm without breaking a sweat. She swerved to catch it and flew straight for the goal posts. The Keeper was watching her fly right to the post on the left. He turned downward to intercept her, but she aimed her throw way above his head into the higher post. There was a groan from the stands as the bell rang once again.

Narcissa flew close enough to James to subtly tease him, "Hurry up."

'_Where in the blazes is that snitch?!' _he thought, frustrated.

Narcissa could make fifteen goals in less than twenty minutes, if worse comes to worst. He had to focus.

Sirius was resisting the urge to cheer his cousin on. He had to admit, she was brilliant at Quidditch. She dominated the field. If Slytherin won over Gryffindor, Hufflepuff did not stand a chance. Their team had good Chasers, but also the weakest Keeper. Ravenclaw might fare better. Their Keeper was the best of the four teams, but their Beaters were as much a burden to their team as to their opponent.

Sirius noticed that the crowd surrounding him had gone silent. The Gryffindor spectators were all looking for the snitch. But it was still James who saw it first.

He caught a glimpse of a flashing golden speck close to the ground, and he dove down as quickly as he could. The opposing Seeker followed suit. They were going at the same speed, straight down, and just as the snitch looked to be in their reach, it flitted to the side. They pursued it, each one reaching forward in the hopes of grabbing it first. But just as James felt it was merely an inch from his fingertips, a Bludger approached on his right. He cursed and turned sharply to the left, colliding with the other Seeker. They had lost the snitch.

In that time, Narcissa had scored two more goals and was just about to make her third.

The Gryffindors' spirits sank as the bell rang. It was incredible and none of them could figure out what her motivation was. She had never been so competitive before.

It began to rain as the game wore on. The score was sixty to a hundred and twenty, in favor of Slytherin. All goals were scored by Narcissa. If she scored three more goals, she would win her bet with James. She could almost taste the tension. The Gryffindors had quieted down; the Slytherins were screaming themselves hoarse. As she scored another goal, she wondered how James was faring. She knew he had not been able to find the snitch again.

The ringing of the bell had become a steady beat that his mind throbbed to. He could not lose. It just wasn't natural for him to lose. He shook his head and ran a hand through his hair.

_Two more goals… Damn that snitch_, he thought, frustrated. Fifty Galleons almost seemed a trifle compared to how much of his dignity would be lost. He was the greatest Seeker Gryffindor has ever had! He could not lose. Not this bet and definitely not this game.

And there it was, just as another goal was counted for Slytherin.

He hurried towards it, before it could flit away. The Slytherin Seeker had not noticed. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Narcissa and the other Slytherin Chasers in pursuit of one of their Chasers who held possession of the Quaffle. He tried to focus. It was there, almost within his reach. And just as his fingers closed over it, a tumultuous noise erupted from the crowd. But it was not the thrilling sound he expected to hear.


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note**: Thank you to my readers. And I am sorry about the late updates. I'm down to the last two months of this semester, so all the work is beginning to pile up on me. Anyway, thank you, thank you for reading and for your patience. I hope you enjoy the story enough to review and read constantly. And I hope I can put the next chapter up sooner. Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Eleven**

_Arguments_

_

* * *

_"That was a deliberate, cold-blooded ---"

"The game was over!"

"She was way out of line!"

"You filthy little ---"

"Gryffindor should forfeit the game!"

The Slytherins were furious. The crowd was a mess of cheers and shocked gasps and angry shouts. Their angry statements were answered mostly by the professors who had rushed onto the field to prevent a fist-fight or worse.

"Quiet down, we'll decide what is to be done."

"There is no need for name-calling."

"It is not up to you to pass punishment."

Narcissa had landed on the ground and dropped her broom. Biting her lip and wincing, she gingerly brushed her fingers against her shoulder. The pain was spreading down to her fingertips, like a thousand blades nipping at her skin. Her teammates were gathered around her, seething.

At the last moment of the game, Molly had directed a Bludger at Narcissa. And, being in the middle of attempting a goal, she failed to notice. The Bludger hit her squarely on her right shoulder, nearly knocking her off her broom. Her shot had missed. And in the midst of it all, James caught the snitch.

"I'm alright, thanks, this is just a scratch. Madam Dolley can mend bones in a heartbeat," she told them with a smile as she reached for her broom. One of her teammates picked it up for her. "That is, if the bones are broken."

She looked over at the Gryffindor team. Lily and Harriet, and Remus, Peter, and Sirius were there as well. They were having their own squabble. And much to her distress, it seemed that James was at the heart of that argument. Her team was ushering her off, but not fast enough for her to miss a saddened look from James. She did, however, miss the conversation that the Gryffindors were having.

It was James and Sirius against the rest of the team.

"I was not out of line! We were still in the game!" Molly argued.

"I had the snitch right in front of me, barely inches away!" James argued. "You couldn't hold off for another blasted moment?!"

"It was the Slytherin Beaters' fault, if anyone's to blame! They should've been doing their job! Was It my fault she was hovering there like a sitting duck?!"

"You should have had more sense than to trust those Beaters to do their job! Narcissa's a Chaser; she was in the middle of making a shot! Of course she'd be hovering around!"

"You're taking their side?!"

James turned red and looked about ready to kill.

"James, calm down, no one died or anything," Robert spoke up, his little voice barely making an impression, especially when James shot him a furious glare.

Molly crossed her arms over her chest. "Robert is right, James. No one died."

"Point is, you didn't have to injure her! You could've ripped her shoulder off!" Sirius shouted.

"No one asked you," Molly retorted.

Lily raised her hands. "Calm down everyone, please."

"Don't speak to him like that, Molly. You're the one on trial here!" James said harshly. He thought of Narcissa clutching her shoulder in pain, the grimace on her face was heartbreaking.

Molly fumed, her ears turning a bright shade of red. "I did nothing wrong! What I did was within the rules of the game!"

"I have half a mind to take you off the next game!" James yelled.

Sirius nodded in agreement, angry. "As well he should!"

"Stop it!" Lily almost slapped James. "Molly is right, James, what she did was within the rules of the game. She hit the Bludger before you caught the snitch. The following consequences were…"

She drifted off. James was glaring at her, a cruel, piercing glare that she felt herself cowering under. "James…" she murmured meekly.

He looked away from her and addressed his team. "Well, congratulations, Gryffindor, we won. Come on, Sirius, let's go." He marched off, without so much as another glance at Lily. The team watched him stalk off, harboring a mix of confusion and frustration within them. Even Remus and Peter hesitated before they hurried after their two friends. None of them could feel the elation of a game won. Lily watched him walk away and sighed sadly. She knew he was wrong, but she felt terrible nonetheless for not taking his side.

She and Harriet returned to the Hogwarts Castle as the stands began to empty, the wet grass sloshing noisily at their feet, the sound magnified by their silence. Harriet knew that Lily needed comforting, but she had no idea where to begin. It was never her forte, after all. It was usually Lily who kept calm and composed under these kinds of pressure. And to make matters worse, Severus was standing right at their path. He looked right at Lily and, as they passed, he spoke.

"I told you to think about it, Lily."

Harriet frowned at him. "Go away, Snape," she said haughtily. But Lily had spoken, too.

"I am thinking about it."

Harriet looked at her best friend with concern. Lily was worried, deep in thought about something that seemed out of her control. It was unnerving, seeing her act this way.

"Lily," Harriet said gently. "Is there anything you want to tell me…?"

She remained silent. They walked towards nowhere in particular. Harriet could feel a growing sense of unease. She watched as Lily clenched and unclenched her fist, watched as the creases on her brow deepened and the frown strain against her lips.

"Lily…?" she tried again, touching Lily's arm and making her stop. "Let's talk. What is it that Snape told you to think about…?"

They were on one of the moving staircases and she was leaning on one of the cold, stone banisters. "He told me that James was going to cheat on me with Narcissa."

"I don't think that's possible," Harriet answered matter-of-factly, almost scoffing that Lily was worrying about something that seemed, to her, so trivial.

"You don't believe him?"

"Who does? You're the only _friend_ he has, Lily, and I still don't see why you stoop down to his level. For all we know he could be lying."

"You don't know him like I do. Sev would not lie to me."

"How well do you know him?"

Lily frowned at her. "Harriet, Snape is not the problem. James is."

"Why don't we look at this from another angle? Does Narcissa seem the type?"

"Well, she _is _a Slytherin."

"And so is Snape."

Lily screamed inwardly. Harriet sighed. They both knew that there could be no logical agreement between them. And what made matters more difficult was that neither could tell which side they were still fighting for.

"Is this because of how James acted at the game?"

"Yes," Lily replied truthfully. "Molly did what she had to do as a Beater. James must know that. He was defending Narcissa." A pause… "And I doubt he's doing it because of Sirius," she added at a look from Harriet. Again, there was silence, both of them deep in thought.

"I think we should give all parties a fair chance," Lily muttered. "I am not saying that I mistrust Severus, but I am not going to decide who I believe in until I know what's really going on."

"And how are you going to find out…?"

"Through the only one who has yet to give a statement. Narcissa."


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's Note: **Thank you for reading and reviewing! I hope you enjoy this chapter!

* * *

**Chapter Twelve**

_Friends Tell_

_

* * *

_

"James, Sirius, wait up!"

Remus and Peter had to break into a run in order to catch up with their friends. James was still angry, it was obvious. He refused to look at any of them, and refused to stop, until they reached the Gryffindor Dormitory. Everyone they passed along the way moves aside hurriedly, as if James was exuding an aura so intimidating they could not stand to be in his path. And upon reaching the portrait of The Fat Lady, James could not even calm himself down enough to speak the password clearly. It was Sirius who spoke up for him and led the group inside.

There were only three other Gryffindors in the common room. Sirius scared them off with a glare and they rushed upstairs or outside. Once the room was empty, the interrogation began.

"What's going on, Prongs?"

It was Remus who asked, his gaunt face filled with concern for his friend.

James turned to face him, his face filled with unrestrained irritation, before sinking down into one of the armchairs littered around.

"I'm willing to bet my fingers off that you aren't irked because of Molly…" Peter mumbled, his hands twitching at his lap as he took a seat on one of the many armchairs.

Sirius sighed and was about to say something when James interrupted.

"Well, at least you have a brain enough to notice that!"

Peter looked away, berated.

"I'm sorry," James said, his expression softening.

"Tell us what's wrong," Remus urged.

"What am I doing here…? I have to go to the Hospital Wing," James muttered, pushing himself off the armchair, only to be shoved back onto it by Sirius.

"You have to tell them, James." Remus and Peter were throwing him questioning stares.

James pressed the palm of his hand against his forehead and leaned back against the armchair. "There's nothing to tell, Padfoot. I love her…" he said, almost inaudibly, looking at each of his friends. His hand, balled into a fist, moved down to his chest. "I love her. This is magic, that's what it is. This is real magic right here." His lips curved into a broken sort of smile. "I want to see her. She's hurt. I have to see her."

Sirius groaned. "I'm worried, too, but she isn't dying, Prongs. It's a broken shoulder, at worst. Still, I am so mad at Molly. She should not be trusted with a weapon of any sort. But she is one brilliant Beater."

"Whose side are you on?" James queried. "Moony, sit down won't you?"

"How did this happen…?" was Remus careful question as he took a seat on the couch, beside Peter. "What about Lily…?"

"I love them both. A different kind of love for each," James answered. "Lily is this and that… And Narcissa is just something else, everything else…" He sighed, at which his friends twitched and raised their eyebrows.

"That did not help," Sirius said, brushing his hands through his hair.

Truth was that James simply could not explain. He could not even remember clearly when or how it began. Was it when they shared that first kiss? Was it a couple of years back? Was it when he started to notice how she was growing up to be stunningly beautiful? All he knew now was that he was in love with Narcissa Black, a love doomed to end in tragedy, but still a love worth risking everything for.

"Alright then. I think I'll go see her now," he said, hurriedly getting up and leaving before Sirius can stop him. Remus and Peter watched him walk out the doorway and turned to Sirius for an explanation.

"If he could not explain it, neither can I," he said.

"So he loves Narcissa, that's great," Peter said.

"It is not great, because James should be with Lily," Remus countered.

Peter's hands began twitching. "Narcissa is prettier than Lily."

"Lily is smarter," Remus pointed out.

"Narcissa is good at Quidditch."

"Lily is ---"

Sirius yelled in annoyance. "Quit it, you two! It was never up to us to decide, it's all James."

"Then this is alright with you?" the question came from both Remus and Peter.

"No. But Narcissa loves him, too," Sirius grinned. "I'd be damned if I tried to stop her. Oh, but I must say I have tried."

Remus frowned, knowing Sirius and James were saying a lot less than what really needed to be said. Peter, on the other hand, did not seem to care half as much.

The Hospital Wing was a buzz of noise and movement as the Slytherins filed in with Narcissa. They were angry. What if Narcissa could not play for the next game? They were arguing amongst themselves. The Beaters should have been keeping a closer watch on her. The Chasers weren't helping her at all. The Seeker was downright useless. The Keeper kept letting the Quaffle slip through. There was no end to their bickering. That was roughly an hour ago. Irritated by the racket, Madam Dolley was forced to kick everyone out.

"Tut tut, you've broken it."

Narcissa winced when her shoulder was touched, despite the tenderness with which it was done.

"Now, sweetie, this won't hurt one bit. But you mustn't move much now, alright? If you do while the bones are setting, I can't say it still won't hurt one bit," Madam Dolley explained. She was mixing several unknown ingredients into a small pot of boiling water.

"What is that…?" Narcissa asked as an acrid odor filled the room.

"Oh, it's an old remedy but it'll put you right."

The pungent smell grew stronger and Narcissa coughed.

"It tastes a lot better than it smells, dear," the nurse chuckled.

Narcissa could not find it in herself to believe it. Madam Dolley was proficient in healing spells and charms. Unfortunately, she loved Potions and chose that over using her wand whenever she could. This was one of those opportunities. She handed Narcissa a steaming mug of the concoction.

"Drink it down to the last drop," she said, clapping her hands together once. "And then we'll keep you overnight and see how things go in the morning. Yes?"

"Yes," Narcissa replied uncertainly. She had looked into the mug and the purple liquid bubbling in it did not look very appealing. She downed it as quickly as she could, the gripping sensation reminding her slightly of the first time she tasted firewhiskey. The taste, sadly, was not as thrilling. It was like swallowing bunches of bubblegum that had been flavored with bitter crushed leaves. Resisting the urge to gag, she placed the empty mug on the bedside table.

Madam Dolley, satisfied that her patient had done as she was told, left to retire to her own office. And just as she shut the door behind her, Narcissa had a visitor. It was not, however, neither who she expected nor wanted to see.

"Hello, Narcissa," the voice was as slimy as the person from whom it came.


	13. Chapter 13

**Author's Note**: Thank you to my readers! I hope you keep reading and reviewing, despite my terribly late updates. Here's Chapter Thirteen! Have fun!

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen**

_A Threat and a Warning_

_

* * *

_

"I hope you don't mind, but I'll get straight to the point," Severus said.

Narcissa maintained a blank expression.

"I know about you and James, and I know about you and Lucius Malfoy," Severus whispered, leaning over the foot of her bed. His long strands of greasy black hair were falling around his face, creating frightening shadows. His eyes were surrounded by dark rings, glaring against the pale white of his skin.

"How did you know…?" she asked. She had told no one, only Sirius. And neither he nor James would tell anyone, especially not Snape. Her engagement had been a secret. It was something she had been very discreet about.

"You have not been as careful as you thought," Snape murmured, his gaze overpowering her. "And now I know your darkest little secrets."

Narcissa felt the room grow cold all of a sudden, as if a dementor entered. "Are you threatening me, Snape?" she asked harshly, despite the apprehension that was tugging at her.

"Of course not," Severus replied, a twisted smile on his lips. "Not yet."

She swallowed hard and glowered at him. "What do you want?"

She stared coldly at Severus as he walked over to the side of her bed and took a seat on the chair placed there for her visitors. He seemed so perfectly at ease that she found his presence unnerving.

"Not much," he said. "I am going to make you a deal. A very simple one…"

Narcissa inhaled deeply. She felt a sudden rush of hatred for Snape well up within her. "Spill it out. I don't want to have to look at you a moment longer than necessary."

"Watch your words you little whore. Remember, I have found the weakest link to the chain holding your entire world together," Snape said. "But you don't have to worry just yet. In fact, your foolishness is my most desired wish granted."

"Why?"

"Because you are going to help me take James out of the picture… And when you do, Lily Evans will be mine." The smile on his face grew fiercer.

"I have no plans of separating James and Lily." There was no hesitation in her voice. The smile on his face disappeared.

"Yes, I heard. But if you do not, I am going to ruin your life."

Narcissa gritted her teeth. "No one is going to believe you, Snape. My word against yours… There is no question as to who will be assumed the liar."

Snape pushed her down on the bed, one hand covering her mouth and the other crushing her injured shoulder. "We'll see, Narcissa Black. We will see."

He left her hurriedly and without another word. She sat back up and was touching her shoulder. The pain was excruciating, like her arm was being burned and ripped to shreds. And while she could prevent a scream, she could not hold back the tears. And she was thus hunched over, crying, when James entered the Hospital Wing. She did not hear him approach.

"Narcissa…?" he said, sitting on the side of her bed. The concern was evident in his voice, but she could not even look up at him.

"James…" she choked out. "It hurts…so bad…I…" she broke into a continuous stream of sobs.

He gently pulled her close, feeling her pain overwhelm him. "I'll call Madam Dolley, alright?"

"No, stay, please…" she murmured, burying her face in his chest. "Please don't go… Snape might… I… Just stay…" she choked her words out between cries of pain.

"Snape? What did Snape do to you?" James asked. "Narcissa?"

But she was delirious with the pain. And it seemed to be increasing because he could hear her soft cries growing louder. He kissed her hair and rubbed his hands against her back soothingly. He felt his fury intensify just as he heard her begin screaming.

Madam Dolley appeared beside them. "What's going on?!" she sounded just as angry as James was feeling. "What happened? I told you to stay still…!"

Narcissa's screams were driving James insane. Her suffering shattered his soul. "I am going to kill Snape…" he said, not even knowing what Snape had done.

Narcissa gripped his hand tightly and shook her head. He leaned close to her, caressing her cheek with his fee hand. "I'll make everything alright, Narcissa," he whispered. "I love you…"

"This had better not be your doing, Potter," Madam Dolley said as she hurriedly drew her wand. She was upset that she had to resort to casting spells.

"It isn't," he said, and he left the Hospital Wing.

In his rush to leave, he did not see Lily hiding behind a column nearby. But she noticed him, and she sighed and stopped him before he walked away.

"James, we need to talk," she said, catching his attention.

"Oh, Lily," he said. "Have you seen Snape?"

Lily frowned. "I need to talk to you, James."

"Lily, not right now please," he said impatiently. "Where is Snape?"

She fought back the impulse to slap him. "What is going on between you and Narcissa, James?" there was an edge to her voice, dripping with cruelty and accusation.

"What?" James asked, dumbfounded.

"Is there something between you two? You're hiding something, James, I know it. If you like her, then why did you want us to go out? And if there isn't anything, then why do I feel like there is? Why does it look like there is?"

James ran a hand through his hair. "You're being paranoid, Lily. Can we talk about this later? I need to find Snape."

He looked so resolute that she knew it would be pointless to press him for answers. "Fine, go," she conceded, and he left. In the Hospital Wing, Narcissa had quieted down. Lily pressed the tips of her fingers against her temples and moaned inwardly. James gave her chronic headaches. Later, she would make sure that he answers all her questions.

Madam Dolley had left Narcissa, passing Lily on her way out of the Hospital Wing. She was probably going to the greenhouses or the Potions stockroom. Lily stepped inside the Hospital Wing and headed towards the only occupied bed. Narcissa's slight frame was covered in blankets but was still visibly trembling. Beads of sweat dotted her forehead and her skin was pale. But she was asleep. And Lily knew better than to wake her simply to interrogate her.

She was so beautiful. Even in this piteous state she was lovely, like an angel. Lily found it difficult to even suppose that Narcissa could ever be part of a conspiracy against her. She wanted to believe that she was simply being paranoid, that James was right and Severus was wrong. Her head began to throb again.


	14. Chapter 14

**Author's Note:** Wow, I think I may have officially broken my own personal best at longest duration between updates. Hahaha! And because it's been so long, a bit of the plot has changed. The idea is the same, but how I'll go about it is a little bit different. I hope nothing in the upcoming chapters goes against what I've previously posted. Anyway, enjoy reading!

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen**

_James and Lily_

He aimed and landed a punch right on Snape's jaw. "What did you do to her, you bastard?!"

James found Severus alone in a hallway not far from the Slytherin dormitories. Snape turned to face James when he heard his name called and found himself face to face with a tightly clenched fist. The first punch was followed by another one but Severus managed to block the blow with his arm.

"What the hell, Potter?!"

Both drew out their wands, holding the tips hardly an inch from each others' faces.

"What did you do to her…?!" James demanded between gritted teeth. His knuckles were white with the tension of his grip on his wand. A dozen spells he wanted to cast at Snape was flooding his mind.

Severus Snape grinned. "I told her I knew your secret."

James' hand trembled, his wand shaking with it.

"That's right, Potter. I know all about you and Narcissa." Severus laughed quietly. "How does it feel to be the one who could lose, who could end up with nothing…? I can finally get back at you, after six years. And Lily will finally see you for what you really are!"

James shoved Snape off and pointed his wand. "Expelliarmus! Stupefy!"

He cast the spells in quick succession, hoping to give Severus no time to defend himself. But his aim was clumsy, despite the closeness of his target, because of his rage and both spells missed. Severus had taken his stance and was prepared to retaliate when a hand firmly gripped his shoulder.

"Severus Snape and James Potter… Not dueling, I hope."

James lowered his wand at seeing the Headmaster. "No, Sir," he mumbled. But he threw an angry glance at Severus, a glance that felt as sharp as if he had been throwing daggers.

Professor Dumbledore smiled warmly at them both and released Severus. He did not question what they were up to and made no indication that he was angry. Instead, he wore an expression so calm and composed that it almost felt ridiculous. Of course, neither James nor Severus planned to walk quietly away from this the moment Dumbledore left. Both were itching to continue as they eyed Dumbledore leaving. It was then a great frustration and disappointment when Lily suddenly came up to them.

Ignoring Severus, she caught hold of James' arm. "I need to talk to you, please."

"I'm in the middle of something, Lily," he replied, hardly looking at her.

She glanced up at Severus, whose eyes seemed to have lightened at seeing her. But she said nothing. She merely tightened her grip on James and insisted that he answer her questions.

"A drop of veritaserum ought to do the trick," Snape muttered.

Lily scowled. "Sev, please, this is between James and me."

James sighed, resigned, and pocketed his wand. "Alright, Lily. Let's go."

He felt her hold on him relax and he caught her hand in his. He smiled one of his most charming smiles and led her away from Snape. He knew very well that if he allowed them too much time in each other's presence, Lily might take Snape's word more than his. It would be his ruin and a betrayal of what he and Narcissa had. He led Lily away from the dungeons and up several flights of stairs, across several corridors, towards the Gryffindor Tower. The walk was long but they were quiet. Lily was preparing the questions she wanted to ask, and James, anticipating them, was sorting out his answers.

Fortunately, the Common Room was still empty. James took a seat, the same one he had taken earlier when he was with his friends, and she sat on the armchair closest to him.

"James…" she said softly.

"You're jealous of Narcissa, aren't you, Lily?" James teased with a sheepish grin on his face. "I can tell, so you don't have to hide it from me."

Lily's face flushed. "I…yeah, you can put it that way." James' easy-going manner had broken through her annoyance with him. She looked at his face, the grin still there, and felt her heart flutter.

"Truth is I've always liked Narcissa," he said.

The statement shocked Lily.

"But I have always loved you, Lily," he added. He leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. "Hasn't it been obvious?"

"Then do you still like Narcissa…?"

"Yes. I don't know, maybe it's Sirius rubbing off on me. You know how he is around her. Maybe it's because she's the only Slytherin with more than half a heart," he said, studying how Lily reacted. Her expression remained composed. "She's pretty, Lily, and smart, and I've never known a girl who could ever seem more innocent than Narcissa Black."

Lily blinked but said nothing.

"But I am a Gryffindor in spirit, and it is to a Gryffindor that my heart and loyalties lie," he murmured with a smile, reaching up to stroke her cheek. "Call what I have for Narcissa a crush, if you want to, but it cannot be more and is probably much less than that. I love you, Lily, believe me. And I have waited too long to have this chance with you only to have you doubt me."

Her questions were forgotten. Even her curiosity as to why James was so intent on finding Severus earlier was erased from her mind. She has waited long for James as well, waited for when he would finally grow up enough to ask her out. And now that he was ready, all she had for him was doubt. There was a ring of truth in the sound of his voice that she could not deny, although she could not decipher that shimmer in his eyes. She shook her head slowly.

"I'm sorry, James," she said. "I just… It's been crazy, that's all."

James stood up to stand in front of her and caress her cheeks in his hands. "Trust me, please, Lily," he said. Slowly, he pressed his lips to hers. He heard the sigh in her throat and felt her tremble at his kiss. Her hands found their way onto the back of his neck, and pulled him closer to her.

In the back of his mind, he took pride in knowing there was no way Snape could convince Lily now. But at the bottom of his heart lay a little sliver of guilt.


	15. Chapter 15

**Author's Note:** Thank you very much to my readers and reviewers. I hope you enjoy reading Chapter Fifteen!

* * *

**Chapter Fifteen**

_The Marauders' Map_

James stayed clear of the Hospital Wing and put a lot of effort into spending as much time as was humanly possible with Lily. He could not have her doubt him again. He had not lied, at least not about his feelings for her. He loved Lily. But he did not reveal to her his feelings for Narcissa. What he said was much less than a crush was in fact a thousand times stronger. It pained him to be away from Narcissa, to be unable to steal glances at her during meals or to run into her in the hallways. What was only a day of separation felt a year to him. It was a consolation that he had Lily with him, but it was not nearly enough.

Narcissa, too, was suffering the same pain. Madam Dolley had done wonderfully, healing her injury overnight, but she was unable to move her arm at all and it was throbbing numbly. She lay in the Hospital Wing through the weekend, receiving several visits. But there was not even a peep from the person she wanted to see the most. It was torturous, as if the thrill of living had gone right then and there.

Monday morning was a blessing to them both. Narcissa was finally free of that overly hygienic Hospital Wing and was back in the throng of breakfasters in the Great Hall. James saw her instantly, flocked by several of her girl friends at the Slytherin table, some of whom were sneering in his direction. It was just like them, to fawn over their injured housemates as if they were dying and to use that as a reason to direct fury and insults at the Gryffindors. James wished Narcissa would look at him, but she did not. He could not catch so much as a glimpse of the beautiful blue eyes he missed so much.

He took a seat, between Lily and Severus, and helped himself to some eggs and bacon. He was trying to suppress his desire to look at Narcissa, and was trying his hardest to focus on what Lily was saying, but it was difficult. Narcissa was fine now, he could see her, and talk to her, and hold her…

His thoughts were broken by the owls, as they flew into the Hall to deliver the mail. He turned his attention back to his food. He rarely received mail. And, expectedly, he didn't. Sirius, on the other hand, received a note from a familiar owl. He sighed as he took the neatly rolled up piece of parchment, tied with a green and silver ribbon, in his hands. He rolled it over between his fingers and saw a label.

_For James. Later._

He looked around and saw Narcissa smile at him. He raised his eyebrows at her and was about to untie the ribbon when he saw her shake her head vigorously.

_A private letter…? _He thought, with a bit of disdain. Still, he decided to fight off his curiosity and pocketed the note. Obviously, Narcissa wanted him to give it to James later when Lily was not around in order to avoid suspicion. But Sirius would not be surprised if Lily still found out. James had seen the letter, had read that it was for him, and was now visibly restless.

"James, are you alright?" Lily asked, noticing that James demeanor had changed all of a sudden.

She was answered with a grin as James scratched the back of his head. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

Deep inside him, though, was a shock of lightning coursing through his system. Narcissa had sent him a letter. He could not wait to read it. He could not wait to be away from Lily.

"Are you going to tell me what she wrote?" Sirius asked. They were in Defense Against the Dark Arts and hardly paying attention. Remus was taking notes anyway; they could copy from him later.

"No!" James replied in a half-whisper.

He tugged at the ribbon, untying it, and placed it in his pocket. He unrolled the parchment and held it protected against all eyes except his own.

_I missed you, James…_

His heart ached, reading only the first few words. And he could not look away from them. Her handwriting was so lovely. And he felt as though he could hear her saying those words, as though he was touching her hand as she wrote them.

_Could we meet tonight, midnight, at the foot of the Astronomy Tower?_

_There is something we need to discuss. And I honestly have missed you terribly…_

He ran his fingers over the words. Of course he would meet her tonight. With his Invisibility Cloak, it would be an effortless trip from the Gryffindor Tower to the Astronomy Tower.

_Ask Sirius to pass your message to me in the Great Hall._

_I hope you will say yes._

_Lovingly yours…_

_Narcissa_

His lips curved into a smile that gradually broke into a grin. _Mine,_ he thought. He would see her tonight, and he would look into those mesmerizing eyes of hers, and then he would kiss her…

"James Potter! That had better be related to our discussion or I'll---"

Their professor stopped short as James stuffed the parchment into his mouth and swallowed it, coughing as he did so. Sirius, who was seated right next to him, burst into laughter.

"I have half a mind to give you detention, Mr. Potter… But seeing as how the distraction is gone, I believe we can get back to class." The lesson continued and James thumped his fist against his chest, forcing the parchment down before he choked on it. Sirius was still sniggering beside him and he nudged his best friend hard in the ribs.

The four of them were sitting on their beds in the Gryffindor dormitories. They still had an hour before dinner was to be served in the Hall. James had just relayed the contents of the message from Narcissa to his friends.

"Go meet her, if you want," Sirius said, absently pulling at a loose thread on his robes.

Remus was frowning. "I think you should stop this, James."

"You're no fun, Moony," Peter answered. "I think this is great!"

"Two-timing is not great," Remus muttered, but he was obviously not in the mood to argue.

"Hey," James said, calling his friends' attention. "I need the Map."

They all looked at him questioningly. "You don't need that, you'll get through with just your Cloak," Sirius said. He had a feeling he knew what James needed the Map for.

"It won't be for me," James said. Sirius felt a rock sink down to the bottom of his stomach.

"We are not allowing you to give it to Narcissa," he said sternly.

"Come on, Sirius."

"He's right, Prongs," Remus said. "We aren't supposed to trust anyone with that Map. It's only for the four of us. You're making enough of a mistake, letting her see the Cloak."

"I just don't want her to get caught," he argued. "We'll get it back, of course."

"How are you so sure she'll give it back? She could show it to the Professors. Or, worse, to the other Slytherins," Remus retorted.

"I trust her," James insisted.

"If Prongs trusts her, I do, too," Peter piped in.

"See, Wormtail's on my side. Padfoot?" James said, looking intently at his best friend.

"Okay," Sirius said halfheartedly. Remus' frown deepened.

At the Great Hall, Sirius went straight to the Slytherin Table. Narcissa was already there, seated alone, and she was waiting for him. He held the Map in his hands and was glad that there was no one around Narcissa to overhear what they would be talking about.

"He said yes!" Narcissa exclaimed, a smile on her face. It was not even a question.

"Of course he did," Sirius grumbled.

"You are upset about this." Again, it was not a question.

"No, it isn't that," he said, his heart breaking at the sad tone of her voice. "I just hope the two of you know what you are doing." He sat on the bench beside her. "We – James, Peter, Remus, and I – are going to trust you with one of our greatest secrets."

Narcissa blinked. "And what is that?" The curiosity was obvious in the glitter of her eyes.

Sirius showed her a blank piece of parchment and, at first, she was puzzled. "I can't show you what it does, not here. You'll find out later. Before you leave your room tonight, just touch your wand to this, and say 'I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.' And when you are finished, say 'Mischief managed.' And that's all there is to it."

"What is it?" she asked taking the parchment carefully into her hands, as if it might suddenly spring to life. "And why are you giving it to me?"

"You'll see. It's all James," he said. "We trust you because James trusts you." He kissed her forehead as he stood up. How he wanted to hate her, to scold her because what she was doing was wrong, but he loved her more than he would have if she had been his twin. "Be careful."


	16. Chapter 16

**Author's Note: **I know, it's been over a year. Now I'm struggling to remember how the story was supposed to go... I can only remember a few vague ideas. For now, I'll post the chapters that I had already completed long ago. Hopefully, the rest of the story will return to me... Enjoy!

**Warning: **This chapter precedes a Lemon Chapter.

**

* * *

Chapter Sixteen**

_The Beginnings of Temptation

* * *

_

Time could not have passed more slowly for Narcissa. She grew impatient, and very frustrated from feigning sleep on her bed. But when she finally decided to head out of the room, her heart throbbed with nervousness. She looked at the clock in their common room. It was a good half hour before midnight; plenty of time to reach the Astronomy Tower.

She unfolded the parchment Sirius handed her and drew her wand. _Now we'll see what's so special about you,_ she thought. Touching the tip of her wand to the parchment, she murmured, "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." And from where the wood and the paper met, veins of ink scattered onto the paper. She watched in utter fascination, after the moment the brief spasm of shock had passed. It took only a second for her to realize that it was a map. And another second further to know it was a map of Hogwarts.

Pocketing her wand, she studied the map closely. The detail was impeccable. Every room and every corridor, every single secret passage was depicted clearly. But what astounded her the most were dots, moving along the hallways on the map. And then she saw her own dot, with her name written right next to it. But she could marvel at this for only a second, because barely inches away from her – on the map – was another dot, labeled Severus Snape.

She turned around, breathing heavily, she sought him out. But there was no one there. She looked all around her, but it was obvious that she was looking for a person who simply was not there. She turned her gaze back on the map, and saw that there was no dot. Maybe she had imagined it. Sighing, she smiled. James was so thoughtful, meaning to keep her out of trouble. Her anxiety faded, the apparition of Snape forgotten, and she walked out of the dungeons to head for the Tower.

* * *

Upon reaching the base of the stairs, she sat down and waited. It was as if she could hear the ticking of a nonexistent clock in her head, counting down the seconds to James' arrival. Her eyes were on the map, watching for every moving dot that came close to her location. And finally, she saw his, a few corridors away. The ticking grew louder, speeding up as her heartbeat raced. And when he was about to round the corner to where she was, she looked up.

"James?" she breathed, in a whisper as soft as she could muster. But she could not see him. She looked at the map again, thinking maybe she had made a mistake. But there it was, his dot, standing very close to hers.

And then she saw a disembodied hand grasp hers. "Narcissa."

She would have screamed, if she had not felt him wrap his arms around her, and see a sheet of liquid silver cascade around his feet. Her heart was pounding wildly in her chest. "James," she whispered, returning his embrace. "James…" she said again. She felt his lips against her shoulder and she trembled against him. "I missed you."

"I know," he said, looking at her and caressing her cheek, feeling warmth spread throughout his body from the points he touched against her. "I missed you, too. Don't ever get yourself hurt again, okay?" He grinned, and she loved him.

He sought her lips and kissed them passionately. He placed a hand against the back of her neck and gently held her against him. Pausing for a minute, he looked into her deep blue eyes and sighed her name, sighed that he loved her. But as he leaned over to kiss her she turned away.

She grasped the silver lying at his feet. It was light and silky, and beautiful to look at. "What is this James?" she queried, running her fingers gently over it. She swallowed hard, her eyes far away from James' brown ones. Temptation was biting at her and she did not want to give in.

"An Invisibility Cloak," he said, taking it from her and hurriedly draping it over his shoulders. He took a deep breath, wanting to hide from her that he felt the same temptation, too.

She gasped when she saw his body disappear before her. She reached out to touch him, and he raised his invisible hand to meet hers. "Come," he said.

They climbed the tower together, map and cloak in hand. They reached a doorway, went through it, and shut and locked the door behind them. "Muffliato," James said, casting a spell around the room. They were a flight of steps away from the top of the Tower. But they didn't need to go that high.

Narcissa stood by the window, the cold air crisp and sharp against her skin. But it kept her sane; it prevented the growing heat in her body from controlling her. She tried not to look at James for a moment, not knowing that he was doing the same. They were alone. They were alone and there was an increasing desire within both of them that they felt they must suppress.

"What was it you needed to talk to me about?" he asked, scratching the back of his head.

Narcissa, grateful for his interruption of her thoughts, faced him and said, "I am worried about Snape, about what he said the other day…"

He stepped closer to her and drew her against him. "I don't think you should be worrying about that."

"But, James," she murmured, leaning comfortably against his chest. "I am afraid of what he might do, of who he might tell. And what of Lily…?"

James combed through her soft, golden hair with his fingers, calming both her and himself. "I love Lily, Narcissa, I honestly do. I have loved her for a long time. But when I look at you, when I am holding you like this… I know I love you, too. I know I am madly in love with you." He kissed the top of her head. "There is nothing Snape can do to tear us apart, you hear me?"

"Are you willing to give Lily up for this? For us…?" she queried, her voice shaking.

"Perhaps… About as much as you are willing to break your engagement with Lucius Malfoy."

His hands lowered to the small of her back and he drew her close. She noted that his breathing became slightly uneven, and that his grip on her was strong despite the fact that they were trembling. "James," she mumbled, placing her hands on his chest, intending to push him away. But she could not.

"Narcissa," her name escaped him in a soft growl. He pressed closer against her, the heat from him enveloping her, and she whimpered softly. "I want you…" he whispered.


	17. Chapter 17

**Author's Note: **I...honestly have no idea if I can still continue this story.  
First, it has been so long, I seriously doubt anyone is still following this. Hahaha! Second, it gets harder each day to remember where I wanted this to go. Third, a lot of things has happened... And life has been demanding my full attention lately...  
So, you might be wondering, why don't I just mark this as "Discontinued" and move on? Well, I am not so sure myself, really...

**Warning: **This is a Lemon Chapter. Accordingly, the Rating has been changed from **T **to **M**.

* * *

**Chapter Seventeen**

_ The Epitome of Love_

* * *

He gently pushed her against the stone wall of the tower. His hands were now on her arms, his lips pressed roughly on hers. She could feel him against her, burning with the intensity of his want for her.

"James…" she murmured, her voice quivering. "We mustn't…"

"Please…" he said, his lips trailing down to her neck.

He felt her hands on his chest push against him. It was a weak push, but he felt the pressure. He took half a step back and looked at her. Her lips, deep pink from his kisses, were shaking. Her chin was lowered, but her eyes were looking up at him, pleading in a way he could not decipher.

"What's the matter…?" he asked, lovingly taking her hands in his. "Are you afraid…?"

"Yes," she said.

"Is this…your first…?"

"No," she said, her gaze moving away from him in shame.

Unpleasant memories from the previous summer streamed through her mind. She remembered Lucius, always cruel and harsh with her. Forcing her and breaking her far beyond her limits. He was never afraid to hurt her, never troubled by her screams. She recalled her mother's words, telling her that this was what she was meant to do, that this was something she must never deny him. Her mother had slapped her when she came running and crying the first night. Her father had looked at her with pity, but could not stand against his wife, not even for the defense of his daughter. She was only fifteen, she had thought then, barely out of childhood. They were only engaged, not married, but she was already trapped. Her parents had given her up completely, watching at the sidelines while she was tortured night after night.

And now she turned her attention once more to James. Would he hurt her? Were all men the same? Was this the epitome of their love? "No, it isn't," she told him, unsure exactly what she meant by that, unsure whether she was still replying to his question or to her own. He tightened his hold on her hands and tenderly pressed his lips to her cheek, as if he understood what ran through her mind.

"I will never hurt you, Narcissa," he breathed softly in her ear, shutting his eyes tightly. The flame in him still grew but it had to wait a moment longer, until she was ready. He wouldn't hurt her. Not for the world. He drew back to look at her again. "I love you. Remember?"

"I know," she said. She placed her hands on his waist and drew him close. She was still afraid, but she loved him and she wanted him and she knew he was going to be different. She trusted him. She kissed his chin and nibbled at his lips, moaning softly as she did so.

He sighed against her and lifted her up. She wrapped her legs around him and leaned on the wall. It was cold, almost painfully cold, biting her skin beneath her robes. But in front of her stood James; and the cold only served to intensify his heat and intensify her desire for him as well.

She watched him tug at her robes, pushing them to the side so that only her bare legs clutched at him. He threw a quick glance at the short skirt and flimsy panties that separated him from her. Now he could feel heat emanating from her, too. He pushed his own robes away to unbutton the pants he wore underneath. It took hardly a moment, and soon she could feel him press against her; hot, hard, and wanting.

"James," she said, her arms around his shoulders. His hand was on her now, pushing away, what was to him, scraps of insignificant and bothersome cloth.

He smiled at her, charming her. "Narcissa…?" he said questioningly, and she nodded in answer. Both knew the severity of the passion that burned within them, both could hold out no longer.

It was quick, warm, and wonderful. He felt her leg muscles tense and her grip on his shoulders tighten as he entered her. And for a moment he stayed still, relishing in the sound of her gasp and the rush of blood and adrenaline through him. His desire strengthened further as he started to move slowly inside her. Her cheek was pressed against his neck and he could hear her soft moans and feel the mild tremors that coursed through her body.

Deftly, he supported her with one hand and with the other he lifted her gaze to him. He kissed her, playing his tongue over her lips, at the same time still thrusting deep into her. He felt her tears staining his cheeks but the hands that were now at the back of his neck and head holding him close told him that it was not because she was upset.

She heard a growl deep in his throat and knew he was close. He thrust harder now, and she felt the moisture between her legs increase. She felt beads of perspiration dot her forehead, despite the cold behind her and the chill air that surrounded them. She leaned her head on the cold wall and gasped for air. She could feel James' eyes on her, and she clung to him with every intention of never letting go.

And then in an explosion of what felt like fire, his hold on her relaxed. He withdrew from her gently and embraced her; aware of the sacredness of what she had just shared with him.

"Narcissa…" he said, laying her down carefully. "Thank you."

She looked at him, flaxen strands of hair sticking to her face from the perspiration. Her lips were slightly apart as she breathed in gulps of air. The window to their right was allowing in bright moonbeams that shone upon her like an ethereal spotlight. She looked so lovely, James choked on his own breaths as he watched her breathing, listened to her sighing.

"Thank you," he repeated, kissing her affectionately.

She smiled, beautiful and innocent, loving and utterly trusting. "I love you," she said in answer, reaching up to fix his glasses. "Very much..."

* * *

She almost didn't wake up the following morning. If her roommates had not had the decency to wake her, she would have stayed in bed all day. Still, she made it to the Great Hall in time for breakfast. As she headed for the Slytherin Table, she scanned the Gryffindors quickly. Before she could find James, however, she caught sight of Sirius walking towards her. He had a scowl on his face and Narcissa, face flushed, walked hurriedly to her friends in an effort to prevent him from going to her.

But just when she was about to take her seat, Sirius reached her. She bit her lip, knowing he would be berating her. "I need to talk to you, Cissa," he said through gritted teeth. She gulped, but followed him as he stalked off to a quiet corner of the Hall, a little way away from watching eyes.

"Listen to me, alright? If I could make it so that I couldn't care less about what sort of frolicking you do and with whom, I would. But since I can't, you better straighten yourself out," he said firmly. "I know what you did with James last night. I could tell by the look on his face when he got back." He paused. Then added, "No, he doesn't know I know…"

"Are you angry with me…?" She had her hands behind her back and was biting her lip.

He scratched the back of his head. "I worry about you."

She looked away from him, her hands still behind her back. "I am neither sorry nor ashamed of what I have done. I love him, Sirius…"

"You cannot love him!" he hissed. She flinched and stepped back, as if hurting to be near him. "Narcissa…" he murmured, taking her wrist with one hand and lifting her chin up with the other. "You're engaged. Or did you forget? Your letters, last summer, said you were in pain, that there was not a night you weren't crying. But you said this engagement was the greatest thing that has ever happened to you and you were not going to let anything ruin it."

"But I didn't know then, Sirius," she answered, "that I could be loved this way."


End file.
